2008-08-26

TIPS FOR BUILDING SELF-ESTEEM

I always believed that a real beauty of a woman is very much depended on the self-esteem that she possesses. So try these...

  1. Celebrate you! Reward yourself when you have accomplished something! You don't need to wait for others to recognize what you've done.
  2. Surround yourself with positive people. Spend time with people who are upbeat and feel good about themselves. They, in turn, will put a smile on your face and help you feel good about yourself.
  3. Challenge yourself to try new things.Try a ropes course, learn some new dance steps, speak in front of a large group. Stepping outside of your comfort zone to try new things is a great way to grow.
  4. Be good to your body. Exercising, eating well, and getting plenty of sleep will help you move toward a healthier you—inside and out!
  5. Find and express the real you. No other person has the unique combination of qualities that you have! Be proud of yourself and be courageous enough to express your true feelings.
  6. Have a positive mental attitude. A positive attitude is contagious! You'll feel good and people will want to hang out with you.
  7. Learn from your experiences. Learn from your actions—both good and bad, and use the knowledge you gain to make positive decisions in the future.
  8. Find the humor in everyday life. When you can see the funny side of things, you'll be less stressed and more likely to handle tough situations better.

2008-08-20

THE LAW OF THE GARBAGE TRUCK

In fact, these 2 weeks were actually not a very good memory for me. I encountered some family matter with my in-law family. It was a bit sad to say that this has ruined the good impression and rapport that had build between in-law family and myself so far. Due to the lost of both my parents in early days, I actually rely on my in-law family, and I trust and respect them very much. So, our relationship actually get pretty closer if compare to other in-law relationships. However, the relationship was not being cultivated and well-taken care of due to some narrow minded people in the house. These low educated people were involved and interfered my peaceful and harmony small family. That make me start to hate them and defence my right as a mother with every strength that I have.

Nevertheless, I really appreciated those support and view from my girl friends like Angeline, Lorita, Su-In, Yvonne and my sister. You ladies have successfully cheered me up and survived me through the war. Without them, I could actually make the issue worse.

Besides, I would like to express my apologize to my dearest hubb. Sorry for making you as my garbage truck. Sorry for forcing you to swallow down all my nasty remarks. Thanks for standing by me. I love you.

This is a good story that I would like to share here.

How often do you let other people's nonsense change your mood ???? Do you let a bad driver, rude waiter, curt boss, or an insensitive employee ruin your day? However, the mark of a successful person is how quickly one can get back their focus on what's important.
David J. Pollay explains his story in this way....
Sixteen years ago I learned this lesson. I learned it in the back of a New York City taxi cab. Here's what happened. I hopped in a taxi, and we took off for Grand Central Station. We were driving in the right lane when, all of a sudden, a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his breaks, skidded, and missed the other car's back end by just inches! The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and he started yelling bad words at us. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean...he was friendly. So, I said, "Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!" And this is when my taxi driver told me what I now call, "The Law of the Garbage Truck." "‎Many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it. And if you let them, they'll dump it on you. When someone wants to dump on you, don't take it personally. You just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. You'll be happy you did." I started thinking, how often do I let Garbage Trucks run right over me? And how often do I take their garbage and spread it to other people: at work, at home, on the streets? It was that day I said, "I'm not going to do it anymore."
Life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. Love the people who treat you right. Forget about the ones who don't. Believe that everything happens for a reason. Never let the garbage truck run over you....

2008-08-09

How to Choose Between Home and Work ?

I am uncertain, and I manage to Google the following.

If you're a mother trying to decide whether to stay home, work full time, or work part time, here are six things to consider:

1. Money. Your family's financial picture is obviously important as basic needs such as food, shelter, clothing, and health care costs need to be covered. Beyond the essentials, household needs vary, and it is up to you and your family to decide whether staying at home, working part time, or working full time will work best. If you decide to stay home, consider what the loss of income will mean for the family and for your own spending. Make sure to discuss this with your significant other......
Yes, we have discussed over this a few rounds. He said no problem, but I am uncertain.

2. Personal preference. It is crucial to determine your own feelings about working and staying home, because it can make a difference in your child's life. Experts say a mother's level of fulfillment and the quality (versus quantity) of time she spends with her child are the biggest components to his intellectual and emotional development and to his ability to succeed in the world. "If mom is a happier person, then she is going to have a more fulfilling and therefore healthier relationship with her kids,"
Agree, mom is not happy at work now T__T, easy to feel irritable with the job.


3. Your significant other. Your partner's support of your decision is critical; otherwise there could be many difficulties. If the person that you're living with is unsupportive, he or she may not help you with finances, child rearing, or household chores. Resentments could build up on both sides. If you and your significant other disagree over whether you should stay home or work. Also, whatever course of action you take, make sure to run by potential issues with your partner. If you decide/continue to work, for example, it's important to figure out details such as how long maternity and paternity leave will be, who will pick up kids from day care or school, or who will care for them when they're sick.
Yes, he supports whatever decision that I'm going to make. He leaves to me to choose the date and I'm uncertain.



4. Social network. Wherever you are, make sure you have a group of people who will support you. If you stay at home, look for other moms in the neighborhood who are dealing with the same issues. At work, connect with other mothers either informally, or through structured women's groups. She says stay-at-home moms need to have adult interaction, and all moms can benefit from being around other women who face the same issues.
Stay at home or stay at work, women need to have social life.


5. Career and Workplace. How family friendly your employer is can play a huge role in how difficult it will be to stay home or continue working. Even before you have a baby, look for a job that will be respectful of your family's values. If you decide to stay home, determine how likely it will be for you to return to your job or career. To help keep competitive while at home, like keeping current in your profession by taking classes, working part time, or volunteering in projects related to your career.
I'm certainly know that he is not family friendly, though he himself is a family oriented person.
Means, he loves his own family, but not your family.

6. Culture. Expectations of mothers in families and society can make it difficult for women who have different ideas. If the family tradition involves staying at home to take care of children, for example, working moms may end up feeling guilty about leaving their kid(s) in day care. At the same time, a growing culture of intensive parenting - where the mother and child bond are emphasized - may pressure some women to stay home. All of the family and cultural demands can make a woman feel guilty and resentful. To shed negative feelings, "Remember," , "if the mother isn't happy, no one is happy."
It is true that whatever we decide, we do concern of the others' expectation and views.
And it is also true that a happy mother is the fundamental of a happy family.

This working mom feel really guilty for not spending enough time, and also for releasing my tension to them sometimes. So, she bought a playhouse for the girls from GIANT.





This full time working mom enjoys seeing the girls have fun with the new toy.
Later, they started to play peek-a-boo/hide n seek in the playhouse.


April first to crawl out. Then followed by May.



Ooooo! I catch U liao!


April is tall enough to show her head from the chimney.


Papa was back, and he joined in and be the Big Bad Wolf. This big bad wolf is trying to blow off the 2 little pigs' house.

2008-08-05

17 Quick Ways to Strengthen the Bonds of Love

by Pat Downing

On Mother’s Day, we celebrate the most important job on the planet.
Most moms appreciate being acknowledged, but many still feel overwhelmed by the pressures of daily life. They would like to fit more time with their children into their busy schedules, but don’t know how.
The solution may be easier than you imagine.
The most important thing you can do for your child is to create and nurture a strong, loving relationship between the two of you.
Here are 17 easy ways to strengthen your connection with your child:
The good news is: they don’t take much time.
  1. Always smile when your child comes in the room.
  2. Hug at least once a day. For older children and teens, who may be embarrassed, do it in private. Try telling them YOU are the one who needs it.
  3. Schedule time every day to connect with your child - to talk about how their day went or perhaps read together or play a short game of his or her choice. Regularity is more important than length of time.
  4. Include your children in your daily activities: Let them help in the kitchen or the garden, but keep the atmosphere light and the conversation easy - no scolding or criticizing.
  5. Make up poems or stories together - taking turns adding a line. Laughs are guaranteed.
  6. Use words of encouragement rather than criticism.
  7. If your child needs correcting, do it gently, in a way that teaches, without scolding or put-downs.
  8. Ask your children’s opinions often - about little things and also more important issues. Let them know you value their ideas.
  9. Watch TV programs together that will help your children to learn about life, then ask their opinion and talk about the issues from the show.
  10. Speak to them with courtesy: Say "Please" and "Thank you," and use kind words.
  11. Apologize when you have been wrong. Show them we all make mistakes.
  12. Write a note to let them know you’re thinking about them – perhaps with a joke or funny message - and hide it in their lunch box, book bag or a dresser drawer.
  13. Don’t expect them to be perfect.
  14. Forgive easily – then gently help them learn from their mistakes.
  15. Let your children over-hear you praising them to someone else.
  16. Create a bed-time ritual. It may include reading a story or poem, saying a prayer, remembering loved ones, talking about the day, singing a song, making funny faces or anything that helps you end the day in a positive way.
  17. As you are falling asleep, think of something you appreciate about your child. Feel your love, and send some of it silently to your child.
Sweet dreams.

Pat and Larry Downing of Asheville, NC, have many years of experience counseling teenagers and their parents, conducting family mediations and leading workshops and support groups. They are co-authors of the e-Book, "Feel Good Parenting: How to Use the Power of Your Heart to Create an Extraordinary Relationship with Your Child."
For a free e-book, "How to Get the Best from Your Children," and for more information on how to create harmonious relationships with your children, you may go to: http://www.feelgoodparenting.com/“http://www.feelgoodparenting.com/”
Copyright © 2005 by Patricia Downing
PERMISSION TO REPUBLISH: This article may be republished in newsletters and on websites, provided you include ALL the above information about the authors, as it appears, including copyright information and live website link.

2008-08-01

May wants to be butterfly

Again, yesterday I was alone with May at home. Hubb was not back from work, and April was in the art lesson.
May was eyeing on April's butterfly set that she longs for, but I still couldn't get one for her. April's one was a gift from Aunt Su In.
Since the jie jie is so possessive and powerful, May only dares to touch Jie Jie's things whenever Jie Jie is not around.
I always find May is not as sweet as April, however May does have a pathetic look, that can almost melt everyone tender heart.