A working mother's complex emotion

16:00 Yannie 15 Comments

 When I am at home,
1. I yell at them. 
2. I nag them. 
3. I reprimand them. 
4. I mad at them. 
5. I want them to keep quiet and give me a peace of mind. 


When I at office,
1. I miss them. 
2. I call them just to listen to their voice. 
3. I wish that I am with them. 
4. I want to tell them that I love them. 
5. I constantly feel guilty for all the 5 items that I wrote in BLUE above. 

April has recently outgrown all her clothes, and thus her maturity always made me want to be a better mom to her.


May is always my sweet girl and thus making feel so bad for not being able to talk to her in calm and patient way. 

15 comments:

  1. I feel the same too with my 2 girls..I have been wanting to be a SAHM and still hoping to be one in the future before I retire..They are growing up fast and aafter a few years time they will be going to college.

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  2. i guess that is very normal in us.. when we have it, we kind of take things for granted and never appreciate.. when we do not have it, only we feel regret that we didn't do better and dying to have it.. hahahaha, but of course, what i'm saying here would be too serious for your situation lah.. i think you are a good mommy and probably what you have been doing in the blue paragraph is due to you showing your love to the girls and want them to be even better.. that is what i see.. :)

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  3. April is surely growing up and hope she will be a understanding girl but of course i guess every teen would actually go through the 叛逆期, so hoping you are also prepared for that huh, but no worries, that is for sure a temporary 過渡期 just like all of us have been through, haha.. as for May, i think she most probably is following her big sister as a role model.. okay, not going to talk too much because i don't have daughters also lah~~ hehe!! :p

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  4. They're still small, part of proper upbringing and growing up. My girl is all grown up now...and I still worry if there is no sound from her for sometime, would call just to make sure...and yes, I wish I could move and stay with her in her jungle school but I guess sometimes, we just have to learn to let go.

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  5. You hv been a good mum. keep it up.

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  6. I can identify how you feel, for example for me sometimes I get impatient with my mom and after that when I am alone, I feel guilty and regret what I did

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  7. I am surprised that this Hot Mama Yannie is so hot tempered. This is very normal and you must be posting it out because you felt a bit frustrated lately that you could not change and it repeats in daily cycles.

    I think you need to address your own "inner child" problems in order to calm your emotions and change your impatience. You probably didn't realise that everyone has their own "inner child: issues that created and shaped their character. I also have my "inner child" problems too!

    I copied the meaning from Google -
    noun: inner child; plural noun: inner children

    a person's supposed original or true self, especially when regarded as concealed in adulthood.
    "you may still be acting out the pain suffered by your inner child"

    Here is some tips how people in the West often seek professional help to help them change as some cases were chronic and irritable or beyond help. I am sure you must have seen some horrible working colleagues at your work place. That is partially due to the "inner child" problems too.

    http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2012/09/23/6-steps-to-help-heal-your-inner-child/

    http://www.healyourinnerchild.com/

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  8. Dont worry too much. I am sure your girls understand your dilemma.

    Sometimes I also feel guilty of all the thing I do and say to my kids. I should love them more and understand them. Like what God wants me to. I am still learning to be patient and control my temper.

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  9. Both your girls are so obedient and sweet. You are a good mother so no worries.

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  10. It's like that la. When don't see will "sum gua gua" but when see ..cant help reprimand them when the did something wrong

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  11. hahaha.... not being easy to be a mom. Same as my wifey too. She will nag and shout at them but on the other hand, sayang them deep deep!

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  12. Not easy being a parent. I feel the same way too :(

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  13. Hihi, I'm same here.. At home, I always shout like a mad woman.. I always tidy up the mess like 100 times and I always get mad when I see any mess.. But when it comes to bedtime, or when I'm in the office, I feel bad and regret for what I've done and said to them.. But then, when I go back home after work, I become a mad woman again, hmmmpppp...

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  14. I think this applies to not only working mothers. I am a stay at home mother and I yell at my kids too only to feel bad when I'm looking at them sleeping peacefully. I tell myself to treat them better the next day but it repeats :(

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  15. Haih so true! When I go oversea, I miss my kids the moment I step into the car.
    But when I at home looking after them, I wish I am at somewhere else. Motherhood...... =_=

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